I just finished a brilliant book – Waking Up: Searching for Spirituality Without Religion, by Sam Harris. If you’re interested in spiritual growth, personal development, mindfulness, Buddhism, or just want to expand your mind and improve your mental health, I strongly recommend it. And it’s got me thinking a lot about enlightenment. Is it even a thing? And if so, is it accessible to the likes of you and me, or just to shaven-headed folk who sit for 18 hours a day in some lofty monastery in the Himalayas?

To answer the first question: yes, I am convinced that enlightenment is real. Here are a couple of definitions from Matthieu Ricard – a Buddhist monk and all-round wonderful (and enlightened) human being: ‘Enlightenment is a state of perfect knowledge or wisdom, combined with infinite compassion,’ which sounds a bit daunting, right? I’m not sure I will ever achieve that level of perfection, however hard I try!

But his second explanation sounds much more achievable: ‘Enlightenment is an understanding of both the relative mode of existence (the way in which things appear to us) and the ultimate mode of existence (the true nature of these same appearances). This includes our own minds as well as the external world.’

Put more simply, in Buddhism enlightenment is often defined as waking up. Over 2,500 years ago, the Buddha taught that we are all walking around in a dream, with at best a fuzzy sense of reality. For example, I often write in these posts about feeling defective or not good enough. Why do so many of us feel that way? Because we are trapped in a (bad) dream, in which we are somehow less than other people, incompetent, dislikable, or whatever negative, self-critical story we have been telling ourselves since we were children.

So, as Matthieu Ricard explains, becoming enlightened means waking up and understanding how things really are – both in the world and our own minds.

The path to enlightenment

Still sound daunting? OK, try thinking about it like this. I once heard another Buddhist teacher explain it beautifully. He said that we may never reach that state of ‘perfect knowledge or wisdom’, but we can all step on to the path leading in that direction. And the path is right there beside you. All you have to do is step on to it (try it now, if you like – it’s right there!).

How do we step on to this path? Well, reading books like the one above, or anything explaining Buddhism, meditation, mindfulness or how to generate positive mental states such as metta, equanimity or compassion. Jon Kabat-Zinn’s books are all wonderful, as are those by Sharon Salzberg, Kristin Neff and Rick Hanson.

Developing a yoga or meditation practice (or preferably both) are also fairly simple and doable ways to step on to that path. Working with a skilled therapist, who can help you tell yourself a kinder, more compassionate story about your life, will also get you moving in a helpful direction.

And attending webinars and workshops, like my Heal Your Trauma events, or those of any other teacher who makes your brain light up and heart feel warm – Dr Gabor Maté is one of the most brilliant teachers we have, so do check out his books and events.

If you need some help with developing a meditation practice, check out my large collection of guided meditations on Insight Timer – they are all free, with optional donation. And there are thousands of other wonderful teachers on the app, so feel free to explore them too.

Again, enlightenment sounds like a big, scary, impossible word – but it really just means waking up. Seeing things more clearly. Treating yourself and all other living beings with kindness and compassion. Understanding that everything changes, so it’s unhelpful to try and grasp on to it, or try to be rigidly in control. Knowing that this life is probably the only one we have, so it’s infinitely miraculous and precious. Don’t waste it berating yourself for things you never did, or faults you don’t possess.

Let me leave you with a little mantra for the day, to help generate some self-warmth and self-compassion. Try it often throughout the day, silently repeating each phrase on the in-breath:

May I be safe

May I be well

May I be free from suffering

Sending you love, metta and warm thoughts, wherever you are in the world,

Dan