Being Neurodivergent Brings Great Challenges, But Also Great Gifts

I know only too well how painful being neurodivergent can be. Many of my clients have brains wired differently from the neurotypical majority. Some are on the autistic spectrum and found school hellish – they were horribly bullied, othered and excluded. The stories they told me broke my heart. Other clients have ADHD, which brings a different set of challenges. And others have dyslexia, dyspraxia and other neurodivergent conditions.

There is a big part of me that doesn’t like using these terms and very much hopes that, in a decade from now, we will have much more sophisticated terminology to describe the rainbow of differences in neurological development and brain wiring. But it’s clear that having a brain wired differently brings great challenges and, for many, terrible pain and suffering. For many neurodivergent people just being themselves was a source of profound, life-altering trauma.

Thankfully, we also live in an age of increasing acceptance and sophistication in our understanding of the way brains work. Key to this has been the functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) machines that allow us to see the inner workings of the brain. These miraculous machines detect increased blood flow to brain regions – when you use, say, the Broca’s area of your brain for speech, it ‘lights up’ in the fMRI scan because when neurons become active, they consume more oxygen, which requires increased blood flow to that area.

The miracle of neurodivergence

This was brought home to me in spectacular fashion by this image I saw recently on social media. It is the fMRI scan of two brains, one neurodivergent and one neurotypical. Take a look for yourself.

I just could not stop looking at this image, it’s truly remarkable. We often think about the challenges of being neurodivergent – and, of course they are many – but not enough about the superpowers of many differently wired brains. Isn’t it amazing? And I see this with my neurodivergent clients who see the world completely differently from me, can think and analyse and interpret in ways my brain cannot.

When I am doing internal family systems therapy with these clients, their eyes closed as they explore their internal world, what they see can be breathtaking. It’s like a Technicolor world, fast-moving and shimmering with rich, beautiful images. Sometimes it’s all I can do to keep up! I have to slow them down enough that I can guide and accompany them on their inner journey.

I am writing this post for any readers who may have a brain like the one above, whose spouse, children, parents, students, colleagues, clients or patients do. Of course, for some people higher up the autistic spectrum, for example, the challenges far outweigh any potential benefits. I have no intention of lumping all neurodivergent people together, because as someone once said: ‘If you have met one autistic person you’ve met one autistic person.’

But for those who are able to go to school and live a fairly ‘normal’ life, despite the great pain that may cause them, let’s celebrate their brilliance, quirkiness and glorious complexity. Their brains are beautiful, even if our education system and every other aspect of our societies are not designed for brains like theirs.

If you would like to learn more about autism, the National Autistic Society is a great place to start. Click on the button below to visit their site, which is packed with helpful information.

And if you are struggling with any form of neurodivergence, sending you warm thoughts and a profound wish that your suffering may ease over time.

Love,

Dan ❤️

 

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